What Day Is It Today

Dear Joshua,

Thank you for calling to tell me about Kiwi, your new kitten. I'm sure you will take very good care of her and she will love being in your family.

Yours with Smiling Love,

Gran

Dear Joshua's Mother,

I was a bit surprised last night when Joshua called to tell us about the kitten you adopted at the street fair. But then I remembered that the line for the cat adoption booth was much shorter than the line for the clown making the balloon animals.

I know you are an accountant and understand numbers but I'm not entirely sure you've really done the math on the time investment here. It's also possible there are a few pages missing in the Manual for Moms I gave you when The Boy was born. There should be a chapter on the value of choosing pets with the lifespan of a helium fill versus those which will last to dance on your grave.

Yours with Smiling Payback Love,

Mom