Tanning Solutions

I have a polite middle aged woman's version of the classic farmer's tan. The mid-life woman's version stops just below her knees where her discrete capri pants cut off the sun and starts again on her upper arms just below where the hemmed edge of her cap sleeved t-shirts rest. In between, from shoulder to knee, is a blackout area that hasn't seen sunlight in 15 years.

I was noticing this while waiting in my doctor's office today. She was called away to deliver a baby. Again. What's with babies waiting to make their grand appearance on my time? It must be some sort of gyno rhythm; I cover up with a sheet the size of a hand towel and somewhere nearby a laboring woman is suddenly at ten and ready to push.

It's getting to be common place. Me sitting in a less than private place with some very private places more exposed than I'd like for longer than I want while my doctor delivers a baby. I don't really mind waiting while babies get born; I mind waiting near naked while babies get born. It's a timing issue. Maybe we need to separate the specialty after a certain age. Those of us with no reproductive plans could opt for a GYN who doesn't have the OB attachment.

At the very least, since the blackout zone is on display, they could put in some tanning lights so I could even up my polite middle aged woman's tan.